(Adapted from the work of Susan Campbell)

Stage I: Symbiosis:


Boundaries Collapse & Lovers (or Mother & Infant) Fuse. Love Addiction; Co-Dependence. Jungian: Oceanic Feelings. "In love" is not love.



Stage II: Power Struggle:


Boundaries are Back & Competition Begins (Terrible two's in infancy). Counter-Dependence. Rules & Roles. Jungian: Fires of Separation. "No!"



Stage III: Stagnation:


Owning Power & Self-actualization. (Owning of projections & woundedness) Independence. Parallel Relationship. Jungian: Cooling Waters of Coagulation. "I am!"



Stage IV: Co-Creation:

Highest level of Intimacy. Friendship & Partnership. (Courage & Risk). InterDependence. Jungian: Conjunction--Polarity. "We!"



Couples who reach Stage IV: Co-Creation, have given up their illusions; such as, "You're gonna save me from death!" They realize that conflict is here to stay, they have realistic expectations and they appreciate (in both meanings of the word) their differences.



In this stage they share:


Intellectuality Recreation Work
Emotionality Physicality Conflict
Spirituality Aesthetics Crises
Creativity Commitment Communication

EVELYN I. CHALLIS, Ph.D.© 2021