Evelyn I. Challis, Ph.D

Created by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.

Personal Experience: In late 1988, I sold my Toronto home in order to make my big move to Santa Monica, leaving behind my long since divorced husband (1980) and my now fully grown foster daughter (Traci was 22 and married), so that I could love and care for my father who had lived alone since 1981 when my mother died and was now 86 years old. After the moving van left with the bulk of my furniture, I packed the rest of my earthly goods, my two dogs, one cat and myself into a van and began the 6 day trek to California. Each night after stopping when I got tired of driving, I would read myself to sleep. The book I chose for this journey was "Getting the Love You Want" by Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.. By the time I arrived at my destination, I was so sold on his approach to working with couples that I called his office in New York and asked about any training he might be offering on the west coast. That book and telephone call began a new journey for me that has revolutionized both my practice and my personal relationships. I now know how to work with couples in a way which preserves and strengthens the relationship, and that brings new hope and confidence to co-create the relationship of their dreams.

And what is Imago Relationship Therapy? Imago Relationship Therapy (IRT) is an integrated system of information and skills that singles and couples can learn to transform their relationship. It is designed to be a short-term, cost-effective therapy that empowers people to continue the work of relationship without the therapist. The tools for healing and growth are put into your hands.

Couples working with a Certified Imago Therapist learn practical and effective ways to:

create emotional safety for both partners

rekindle passion and romance

discover the unconscious roots of their conflicts

communicate in a way that deepens and strengthens intimacy and connection

move from reactive/defensive (protective) patterns to conscious, intentional behavior

transform frustration and conflict into pathways to create deeper relationship

understand yourself, your partner, and others

become true partners in healing and growth

empower each other to finish childhood and realize one's full potential

create your dream relationship

Singles working with a Certified Imago Relationship Therapist discover their own patterns that lead to unsuccessful relationships, the dynamics of attraction, and how to create a healthy, happy, and lasting relationship.

"We have not yet learned to handle the tremendous power of romantic love. We turn it into tragedy and alienation more often than we evolve it into enduring human relationships. But if men and women come to understand the psychological dynamics behind romantic love and learn to handle them consciously, they will find a new possibility of relationship both to themselves and to others." Robert Johnson

Imago Relationship Therapy provides the basis for understanding how relationships really work, taking into account that childhood experiences form an unconscious image (the Imago) that is then sought after in a partner. The unconscious forces that attracted us to our partner may also be the source of conflicts and power struggles that develop in the relationship. This therapy provides a powerful and effective method for helping couples learn how to heal rather than continue to hurt one another. By becoming conscious of the childhood wounds that affect your relationship, you learn to become "wounded healers" for one another in a safe, intimate and committed relationship.

Dr. Hendrix says, "We are born in relationship. We are wounded in relationship. And, we are healed in relationship." You can learn how to make your relationship a pathway to healing and wholeness.