Hendrix divides us up as to how we use our energy. We basically conserve it by drawing it into ourselves or we explode it outwards toward our partner and the world. These differences become even more pronounced when we feel hurt, frustrated, or angry. He names the conservers "Minimizers" and the exploders "Maximizers". Usually in any couple there will be one of each. Here are some of their characteristics.
Which one are you?


  1. Implodes feelings inward
  2. Diminishes feelings
  3. Depends upon others
  4. Denies needs
  5. Shares little of inner world
  6. Excludes others from private space
  7. Is clinging and over-giving
  8. Has diffuse self-boundaries
  9. Is outer - directed
  10. Seeks council from others
  11. Thinks mainly about others
  12. Acts and thinks compulsively
  13. Is submissive and manipulative
  14. Tends to be passive-aggressive

MAXIMIZER (Hailstorm)

  1. Explodes feelings outward
  2. Exaggerates feelings
  3. Denies dependency needs
  4. Exaggerates needs
  5. Is (compulsively) open
  6. Brings others into private space
  7. Withholds feelings and thoughts
  8. Has rigid self-boundaries
  9. Is inner-directed
  10. Seeks council from self
  11. Focuses on self
  12. Acts and thinks impulsively
  13. Tries to dominate others
  14. Alternates between aggressive & passive